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From the Onion…

Bush: Maybe U.S. Military ‘Just Not Very Good’

WASHINGTON, DC—Departing from his usual hopeful rhetoric during a question-and-answer session with reporters in the White House Rose Garden, President Bush suggested Tuesday that the war in Iraq has not been successful because the nation’s armed forces are “just not very good.”

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The president admitted that he’d been toying with the idea that a thorough lack of quality in personnel, from the top U.S. commander to the lowest-ranked private, is the only way to account for the colossal failure in Iraq, given that everything on the administrative side of the war has been carried out with the utmost care and precision.

“I know the folks on our end didn’t drop the ball,” Bush said. “The civilian oversight of this war and the plan of attack has been brilliant. There’s no doubt about that in my mind. Hate to say it, but maybe our men and women in uniform just aren’t what they’re cracked up to be.”